N came home in January, about 1 week after New Years.
We came away from intensive intervention understanding N a lot better. We came back to our life with a knowledge that those who cared for him there, truly loved him and enjoyed him. And we knew that N loved being there. He loved home too. But he was happy in that structured world where he lived with others like him, some higher functionning and some lower functionning, with rotating caregivers who wanted to work with kids like him, and knew how to work with them.
It gave me another perspective on the future. I have always thought of how grim it was. I know he will never be able to acquire independence. He will never read, or write, or tell time, or ride the bus by himself, or handle money, or have a job, or have a conversation with somebody. I know he might face years of waiting only to have some kind of service less than well conceived to support his life.
But I realize now, there is the possibility of community, and happiness, for N and others like him, if only we, the able-minded and capable-bodied of this world, can look beyond our own vision of what community means, and be open minded about inclusion, to see creative options for living for our special needs.